THACKLEY TRUMPIT TELL US YOUR STORY

THACKLEY TRUMPIT JULY 2014 BEER FESTIVAL

     The Thackley Trumpit

( Incorporating ‘The Idle Chatterer’ & ‘The Closing Times’ )

Tel. 07944969335   Email: billco@blueyonder.co.uk       

             Idle Beer Festival Success                                                 

By Alex Mohammed

It was with some sadness I looked out of my window on the evening of Friday the 27th of June to an overcast, grey sky. Darker clouds loomed ominously in the distance just to add to the likelihood that the weather was going to turn for the worse. I’d been asked to head up to the Idle and Hepworth’s Beer Festival to get a report on the event and had hoped for some better weather. Despite this, I grabbed a coat in case the heavens opened, strapped on my boots, grabbed a writing pad and set off on the relatively short walk to my friend Matts house, who had agreed to head up to the festival for a bit. As I set off, raindrops started to fall and my glasses gathered the usual condensation. Luckily it only lasted a few minutes, and after a short walk, I reached Matts’ house then together we journeyed forth to the Beer Festival.
We arrived to a small gathering of people huddled near a TV watching Andy Murray play at Wimbledon. I was introduced to Jen, one of the organisers of the event, who was very friendly and made us both feel very welcome. We handed over some money which was for entry and a glass for the evening, as well as some tickets which were used to get the various beers, as the bar was cash free. All that remained then was to try some of the many great beers on offer from the great local breweries. To this end, we grabbed a menu and perused until we selected our drinks. Food was also on offer, and many people went on to partake of mushy peas and hotdogs and the like. We decided to start off with two drinks: a delicious Raspberry Blonde and a beautiful porter called Bright Black Porter. They were both really top notch drinks and set the standard high. A standard, I am glad to say, which remained for the whole evening.
All of the breweries were from the local area and really delivered. On offer were beers from Oates Brewery, Ilkley Brewery, Partners Brewery, Roosters Brewing Co, Elland Brewery, Naylors Brewery, Copper Dragon Brewery, Ossett Brewery, Saltaire Brewery, Salamander Brewery, Wharfebank Brewery and Goose Eye Brewery. Matt and I made it our mission to have at least one beer from each brewery. A fun challenge, I admit, and a tasteful one. We enjoyed ourselves increasingly as we made our way through the beers which included various blondes, hoppy ales and bitters. The prices were all very reasonable too, which is always a bonus! Having opened around 7, the Beer Festival was quiet only for a short period. Within an hour or so, the room was bustling with the locals who joined in whole-heartedly with the drinking. It was great to see that, regardless of the dreary weather, a great sense of community prevailed to give a good turn-out and make the event memorable. We tried a good few more beers including Old Ale, Tabatha and a particularly tasteful IPA called Fort Smith. There continued to be an altogether friendly feel to the event, with everyone talking animatedly and recounting tales to their friends, all the while steadily and happily drinking away. The 12th Idle Beer Festival was off to a flier!
Although Matt and I didn’t really know anyone at the event, we soon were taken in by the contagious atmosphere and got talking to a few of the people around us. It was good fun, telling jokes and stories and making such bad puns which had all of us laughing. The room continued to get more and more packed as the night went on and the atmosphere became further animated as people consumed more of the delightful beers on offer. Everyone was in high spirits, and some of the kids took advantage of a rare brightening in the sky to mess about with a football. The event had a real family feel to it, and the kids appeared to enjoy it just as much as their parents. This atmosphere was added to by a local band, Good Citizens, who played a number of covers. It was nice to hear some good ole’ music and I especially liked their rendition of Madness’ “It must be love” which they really made their own.
As the festival drew to a close I saw a few friends I hadn’t seen in some time, one of the downsides of everyone heading in their own directions as we get older. It was good to spend some time talking to them and catching up, as well as reminiscing about good times back when we were younger. This seemed to me one of the best things about the event; this was happening all over and catching up with friends is always an enjoyable experience. Undoubtedly this helped add to the overall impression I have left of the event, that it was mighty fun. I would also like to thank all the people who worked on the Idle and Hepworth Beer Festival, as well as all the breweries who helped make the night what it was and I am sure others who attended would join me in echoing that sentiment. I look forward to returning to the event next year, when I am sure it will be just as much a success.

THACKLEY TRUMPIT JULY 2014 MUSINGS FROM THE PADDED CELL - THE IDLE LORD

The Idle Lord. 

Musings From The Padded Cell

Britishness 

The media are awash with chat about the notion of “Britishness” in the wake of the Trojan Horse story coming out of Birmingham. As ever, politicians are jumping on the bandwagon likes fleas on an old dog; it is, after all, election time soon.
Rationale debate is still difficult to achieve as this is a ridiculously emotive subject, despite it rising to the top of the agenda largely due to UKIP’s recent successes at the polls.
Cameron, as ever, is flapping around like a one-winged parrot, seeking tough sound-bites whilst selling us off to the Chinese. Miliband, leader of the party that opened the flood gates, is almost invisible; small mercies to be grateful for I guess.
Whilst there are sound economic arguments for controlled immigration, these are inevitably based on the reality – like it or not – that we can be choosy at least as far as non EU migrants. Britain is a nation people aspire to come to.
However, the thing that hacks off Ordinary Joe more than anything else is the fact that the politicians who preach the benefits of mass immigration rarely live in the areas that have to deal with the impact.
One hack wrote at the weekend of the “metropolitan elite” – he meant New Labour – whose policies opened the doors.
Bradford – metropolitan but far from elite – contends with it’s primary schools dealing with almost 150 different languages. This has been a massive failure of the indigenous population. Making kids learn the Magna Carta will not solve this one bit.
There remains a fundamental flaw in the way we treat minorities. Bending over backwards might seem the “fair” thing to do but it misses the point that there are those within these communities that will exploit this weakness as Birmingham demonstrates.
Wherever you live you must surely respect the law of that land. To live here, often on the social benefits a progressive society can still afford to provide, and yet to rail against it’s very existence and cultures is both offensive and ignorant.
Fortunately, most common sense can still be found in the good old British pub – one of the founding pillars of Britishness – and I find it hard to argue with the sentiments I heard expressed at the weekend.
“If they don’t like it then they should *** off.” said my unnamed source, clearly fearful of a kidnap attempt and beer deprivation.
Britishness should be about upholding the values and traditions that we have fought for over centuries. You cannot cow-tow to a raft of migrant cultures simply to appease the politically correct brigade.
And before the human rights brigade pipe up there is nowhere better on Earth than Britain to enjoy human rights; that is why most people still want to come here.

Top man 

I defy anybody not to have seen the story of Bernard  Jordan, 89, and his “great escape” from his care home – fulfilling a wish to attend the D-Day commemorations in Normandy last week – and to have watched without a lump in their throat.
Wonderful stuff from another era and all carried off with grace, charm and a cheeky wink of an old boy’s eye.
Boys own stuff because boys will always be boys.

More From “I Told You So” Corner

According to last weekend’s Sunday Times, Ofsted have finally woken up to the fact that there is almost no competitive sport in state schools and that this is not a good thing. Well done chaps, what took you so long?
Regular readers – I do have a few – will know I have been banging on about this for well over a decade and more. Most recently I wrote a chapter (3) in “Fifty Not Out” on this issue.
However, even more damaging and socially divisive is the fact that these inequalities forged at primary schools are further widened all the way to elite sport.
Take the distribution of funding from UK Sport, essentially dictated by the pursuance of Olympic medals:
http://www.idlelord.com/playing-up-hill/
Bad enough that we fund only sports where medals are deemed possible but look at what we end up with* in terms of the proportion of GB medal winners who were privately educated. Sydney 2000 – 23.6%, Athens 2004 – 27.8%,
Beijing 2008 – 35.7%, London 2012 – 46%
*Sunday Times 15/6/14
England’s cricket team for the first test contained only one player – Moeen Ali – educated in the state system. This is a national scandal and in no small part has played a significant part in the rapid and apparently unstoppable rise in obesity levels nationally.
It is a failure of generations of young people deprived of opportunities to enjoy sport and live a fit and healthy lifestyle. Politicians of all parties should be ashamed of this utter disgrace.

More Musings

At last one of the half-wits that have been disturbing the local area on their souped up skateboards has been prosecuted. 
Sadly the judge backed away from a custodial sentence – bad enough – but it was the comments in mitigation from his solicitor that hacked me off most.
Trying to excuse the lad’s actions because he had had a tough upbringing was pathetic. Why not simply state that there is no defence for endangering peoples lives, taking up expensive police resources and for destroying the peace that most people crave.
The solicitor will doubtless be an educated bloke and will probably live nowhere near the affected areas. What a waste of a good education if you cannot distinguish      between right and wrong.
We cannot keep excusing cretins like this nor simply tag them and hope for the best. It’s like slugs, there is no point in moving them on as they will only keep coming back. Stand on them…hard. 

And More Musings from The Idle Lord

Normally I dread a dental appointment for obvious reasons but ever since falling off a six-foot fence at Christmas, the shame of confessing to nice man Andrei how I scraped my front tooth, has been weighing heavily.

We went through the usual preliminaries.

“Do you smoke?”

“No”

“Do you drink?”

“A bit” said sheepishly.

“Over 30 units a week”

“Depends if Big Al needs keeping company” I offered hopeful he would change the subject “course I do!”

I explained that the reason I, as a normally responsible 51 year old, had fallen off a fence was most likely because that particular night I had probably had my weekly allowance in one go. And that Joe Lawrence had encouraged me to garden hop on the way home.

These days the dental practice is part of a large group and you only have to look around reception to realise that there is now a corporate sell here with all manner of products on offer.

So Andrei must now sell as well as offer torture, whereas nice old Mr Spencer simply gave you that routine “…sound, sound, sound….oooh….kerr-ching…pension time!”

Fortunately, Andrei is as bad as I am at  selling.

“Have you got an electric toothbrush?” he asked.

I showed him my mobile phone and suggested he already knew the answer. Not put off just yet he pointed out how much better these were – on special offer in reception by coincidence – keeping me in the dreaded chair far too long.

I don’t go to the dentist to do anything other than try to get out as quickly as possible. Flogging me a mini-vibrator is not enhancing my customer experience one bit.

“If you stopped drinking for one week you could save enough for one” he offered as one final stab from the sales manual. Time to go seek a pint I thought, see you next year.

THACKLEY TRUMPIT JULY 2014 MAILBAG

MAILBAG

From Jeff Thelwell
During the last few months we have kept the Cote Farm development issue in the news by organising events and demonstrations. Unfortunately the timing of these actions did not match up with the publication of the Trumpet and so we have relied on word of mouth and the kindness of local shop keepers to spread the word. Although this has sometimes led to limited numbers of demonstrators, all our efforts were reported by the Telegraph and Argus and some even made Look North.  Not bad for six people with no money and little    experience of such matters. At this point I should point out that whilst we are not a political group, we owe a big thank you to all our Lib Dem councillors for the use of their organisation, their expert advice and support. Without them, I doubt we would have been so effective. 
We are now waiting for the Planning Office to announce the date of their meeting concerning Cote Farm. We thought it would be June but now it appears to be July or even August. We will however let you know as soon as we get a date so watch out for placards in shops etc. and don't throw any mail away unread as we will make every effort to leaflet the area. We are doing this because we are planning a final action and we are calling on you as residents of Thackley to let the Council know you prefer green fields to overcrowded roads and schools. If a thousand of you can send in an objection, that same thousand can spare an hour in a peaceful demo. We need you, your family and your friends to make this last effort prior to the planning    meeting and then we need as many as possible at City Hall on the big day. Don’t just moan, do something about it! 
Once again watch out for placards, posters and mail!!

From Eric Dean,734, Leeds Road, Thackley.
Come on Lads.  Join the Club
Around twenty years ago it was common to have attendances of around 60 retired men at the Idle & Thackley Men’s Forum.
Now the attendance is between 18-21. Why? The committee have often discussed the gradual drop in attendance and none of us can find a satisfactory answer.
I am Chairman of the Forum and find it a very pleasant duty to        perform. I am proud of the members and enjoy the banter and discussion every Wednesday morning.
I am writing this as an appeal to all the retired men of Thackley, Idle and further afield.
We meet every Wednesday morning from 10.00am -12.00am. We have coffee and biscuits, chat and finally a speaker.
When a new member joins he inevitably finds something in common with the others even back to schooldays and affairs in the locality.
We have an excellent Speaker Secretary and have speakers three weeks out of four on a wide variety of subjects usually with screen presentations.
We are non-political with no religious affiliations. Some of our       members are widowers and it is good to see them settling in, enjoying themselves and becoming part of the Forum.
Don’t be put off by the term Forum. It’s really a get together of older men who like to talk and listen, have a laugh and, incidentally look  after one anther.
Come on Men of Thackley & Idle don’t be lonely or bored. Come and join us. You will be made welcome. Remember, as we used to say in the Idle Musical Union.
FELLOWSHIP IS LIFE!!!
Eric Dean, Chairman, Idle & Thackley Men’s Forum

Good Afternoon, Bill
I've just read the front page of the the latest "Trumpit" with increasing trepidation and dread.
As a proud Thackley boy, I have only spent 18 months of my past 38 years (39 in November) outside the Thackley and Idle area!!!! I grew up In Craghill Road, and I moved back to Thackley Corner in 2011.
I am appalled at what the Council is allowing in our back yard - if someone from our area were to threaten a  development in Pickering, where the Idle Moor developer is based, there'd be uproar. Yet it seems to be perfectly acceptable here!!!!!!
So why can't we have a Parish Council for Idle & Thackley????!!!! The people of Idle & Thackley would have greater influence on matters that affect us - including planning applications!!!!!!!! Thackley and Idle are great places to live: if we had our own Parish Council, we would have a much better chance of keeping it that way.
May I also remind readers that there is a Facebook Group, of which I am the Admin, entitled "Hands Off Cote Farm!!!!" This is the link: 
https://www.facebook.com/groups/187141744787723/
Thanks Kevin Russell

THACKLEY TRUMPIT JULY 2014 HEALTH MATTERS - BE SMART IN THE SUN

Health Matters - Be smart in the sun

By Consultant Pharmacist - Nick Parmar

How does the sun damage skin?

Sunlight is made up of different types of radiation: the Visible part which we see, the infrared part which we feel as heat and the one we cannot see or feel - Ultraviolet (UV) radiation.  It’s this ultraviolet (UV) radiation that damages skin cells. There are two types of UV rays UVA and UVB. Both types cause skin cell damage and skin cancer and it is UVA that is responsible for sunburn. So as the Aussies say Slip, Slop, Slap, Seek, Slide.

Slip on sun protective clothing 

Cover up with clothing made of a closely woven material such as cotton, polycotton or linen to block out the sunlight. If we can see through it, the UV can get through.
Remember wet clothes let through more UV than dry clothes.

Slop on a sunscreen with at least SPF15

The higher the SPF the greater the protection from UVB, children and those with pale skin should use SPF30.
Choose a ‘broad spectrum’ sunscreen which means it protects against both UVB & UVA rays. The UVA star rating should be 4 or 5.
Apply generously – around 2 teaspoons for your head, arms & neck at least 2 tablespoons to cover exposed skin if you’re in your swimming gear.
Re-apply sunscreen every 2 hours – it comes off through washing, sweating etc.
Re-apply after swimming even if it’s labelled waterproof.
Watch out for those easy to miss areas – lips, ears, around your eyes, neck, scalp particularly if the hair is thinning, backs of hands and feet.
Health Matters - Be Smart in the Sun 
by Nick Parmar - Senior Pharmacist at Thackley Pharmacy

Slap on a hat

A broad brimmed hat gives good protection for the neck, face, nose and ears – the areas most commonly affected by sun damage.

Seek shade

The UV radiation is most intense between 11am and 3pm.  Even when we find a shady spot we still need to use other sun protection because the UV rays are reflected off surfaces around us such as sand, water and concrete.

Slide on some sunglasses

The sun can burn/damage the eyes. Sunglasses offer good protection but not all of them are adequate – look for a pair that has one of the following:
The ‘CE Mark’ and British standard BS EN 1836:1997
A UV400 label
A statement that the sunglasses offer 100% UV protection.

Did you Know ?

Sunscreens can go off - so check the use by date printed on the bottle. Most have a shelf life of 2-3 years.
Being kept in the sun can cause the sunscreen to deteriorate and become less effective – avoid buying sunscreen that has been kept on the shelf in direct sunlight or outside when abroad. Keep your sunscreen in the shade.
You can burn in the water – even if you are swimming in a pool or snorkelling in the sea
Clouds can give a false sense of security - UV radiation from sunshine still comes through thin cloud
The sun’s rays are more powerful at high altitudes – so even though it’s cooler up the mountain you will need more skin protection
There is no such thing as a healthy tan. A tan is the skin’s  response to the sun’s damaging rays and is therefore an    indicator of the amount of sun damage.
Sun beds are just as damaging as sunshine.

For further help and information www.sunsmart.org.uk run by Cancer Research, the UK’s national skin cancer prevention campaign.

THACKLEY TRUMPIT JULY 2014 JOE'S JOTTINGS

Joe’s Jottings

Flaming June as they say! Hmm not exactly roasting hot, in fact we had to put the heating on for an hour this morning just to air the place. Windows have had to be closed occasionally. We have had average rainfall and average temperatures. This has allowed plants to grow at a reasonable pace and the garden should be in full bloom as there has been no global warming this month and traditional plants have done well.
As mentioned last month the fruit crop is going to be   massive this year. I’ve got apple trees groaning under the strain of still small fruit, a plum tree that is looking good even though it is only its second year in the ground, I’ve never seen as many strawberries and raspberries on the plants. The strawberries and raspberries are ready to harvest. They are cracking fresh with a bit of clotted cream ice cream. Last year I was down at B & M stores on Kings Road and I spotted a blackcurrant bush for sale at fifty pence. It looked in a bit of a sorry state, in dire need of some tender loving care. I took a risk and purchased the plant. Leaves looked about dead, the soil was dryer than a kangaroo’s jock strap and it had several broken stems. On my return home I plunged the plant into a bucket of water and plant food and left it overnight which perked up a few of the smaller leaves. I re-potted it in a large container with some fresh multi-purpose compost and stuck it in a sunny spot. Keeping the soil damp for a few days transformed its appearance and new growth started to show. Half a dozen berries appeared but never ripened, but the plant was now healthy and looking like a survivor. After the mild winter my blackcurrant sprang into leaf and started to produce some flowers which was a very good sign as it signalled a crop would be available later in the year. Now you may be  wondering why I’m going on about a blackcurrant bush. The reasons are twofold. One, I’ve never eaten a raw blackcurrant and I was intrigued to find out what they tasted like. Would it be sweet or sour, bland or strong? The answer I got was that they taste just like Rowntree’s blackcurrant fruit gums. I’m not sure what I’m going to do with them as I only have the single bush and there are not enough berries to set The Kitchen Skirt to work making something. I will probably just harvest and eat them as they ripen because they are delicious. Secondly these little blighters have thrown up another problem which I had not given much thought to. Young Henry has been working hard in the garden with his granddad, digging up weeds (prized plants),   attacking innocent insects and carefully watering everything in sight including The Skirts washing. His capacity to learn and   inquisitiveness knows no bounds and it is a joy to  behold but it also taught me a darker side to this. Henry is at that age where everything has to be looked at and tasted. Everything goes straight in the mouth, including things that could potentially do him some harm. Now my attitude is benign neglect. In other words let the kid find out for himself and if it stings, hurts, tastes nasty or bites he will be more cautious the next time. What brought the real problem to my attention was an unripe blackcurrant which is green. He came running up to me shouting “Gran-ad, gran-ad, bapple, bapple” followed by a swift movement to the mouth to chew on said “bapple”. Swiftly retrieving the unripe berry from his mouth I concluded it was just a blackcurrant but it could have been something a lot worse. It made me review the plants in the garden that could have a negative effect on our young Henry. A quick trawl of the tinternet shocked me by the amount of potentially dangerous common plants in the  garden. The RHS (Royal Horticultural Society) website has a page dedicated to them as they are too numerous to list http://rhs.org.uk/advice/profile?pid=524 RHS/home/advise/ Potentially harmful garden plants. Hopefully another twelve months learning in the garden will teach him some caution so in the mean time I will have to be vigilant.
At the back of Idle Conservative Club they have opened the field to allotments. Now this field has been an eyesore for years, overgrown with weeds and scrub and looking pretty scruffy. It has now been transformed. Not all the lots as yet are under cultivation, though all have been rented out. I’m assuming that the owners of the empty lots are carefully planning how to get the best out of them. Most are in varying states of cultivation. Fences, huts, raised beds and greenhouses are being erected, vegetables in neat rows look to be thriving. It’s a wonderful use for a derelict space and it can only get better as all the lots get into full swing. I wish them all well.

THACKLEY TRUMPIT JULY 2014 THE GINGHAM DRESS

THE GINGHAM DRESS

A lady in a faded gingham dress and her husband, dressed in a homespun threadbare suit, stepped off the train in Boston and walked timidly, without an appointment, into the Harvard University President's outer office. 
The secretary could tell in a moment that such backwoods, country hicks had no business at Harvard, and probably didn't even deserve to be in Cambridge .
"We'd like to see the president," the man said softly. 
"He'll be busy all day," the secretary snapped.
"We'll wait," the lady replied.
For hours the secretary ignored them, hoping that the  couple would finally become discouraged and go away. 
They didn't, and the secretary grew frustrated and finally decided to disturb the president, even though it was a chore she always regretted.
"Maybe if you see them for a few minutes, they'll leave," she said to him. 
He sighed in exasperation and nodded. Someone of his importance obviously didn't have the time to spend with them, and he detested gingham dresses and homespun suits cluttering up his outer office.
The president, stern faced and with dignity, strutted toward the couple. 
The lady told him, "We had a son who attended Harvard for one year. He loved Harvard. He was happy here. But about a year ago, he was accidentally killed. My husband and I would like to erect a memorial to him, somewhere on campus."
The president wasn't touched. He was shocked. "Madam," he said, gruffly, "we can't put up a statue for every person who attended Harvard and died. If we did, this place would look like a cemetery."
"Oh, no," the lady explained quickly. "We don't want to erect a statue. We thought we would like to give a building to Harvard." 
The president rolled his eyes. He glanced at the gingham dress and homespun suit, then exclaimed, "A building! Do you have any earthly idea how much a building costs? We have over seven and a half million dollars in the physical buildings here at Harvard." 
For a moment the lady was silent. The president was pleased. Maybe he could get rid of them now.
The lady turned to her husband and said quietly, "Is that all it cost to start a university? Why don't we just start our own? " Her husband nodded. The president's face wilted in confusion and bewilderment.
Mr. and Mrs. Leland Stanford got up and walked away, travelling to Palo Alto, California where they established the university that bears their name, Stanford University, a memorial to a son that Harvard no longer cared about. 
You can easily judge the character of others by how they treat those who they think can do nothing for them.

THACKLEY TRUMPIT JULY 2014 THE LIVING WELL ART CLUB

The Living Well ART CLUB

Meets Tuesday mornings, 10am - 1pm,

at St. John’s Hall, Thorpe Edge.

By Jeff Thelwell

Last month I was describing the way the club functions on a day to day basis and the fact that one of our more experienced painters was running a workshop on wet on wet painting.  You may also recall I mentioned that an element of luck was useful in the process.  Well, it must have been my lucky day because my own effort wasn't too bad although I was not as lucky as Trevor (our workshop leader)  Never mind, practice will no doubt overcome a lack of talent! 
Also this month we have a visit from Jeremy Taylor to look forward to so I can live in hope that something will rub off. Jeremy has the unenviable task of teaching us the mysteries of painting water. One book I read on the subject said "don't paint the water- paint the shadows" which sounds a bit Zen to me.
You will be reading this in July and by then the club will close for the summer holidays which means another lunch out and an extended time painting at home. That can be fun although my wife has been quick to point out that watercolours do not necessarily wash out of the best     tablecloth or indeed from the tea towel, so be warned should you get the urge to have a go. On that domestic note I shall leave you and hope that should you wish to try us out you will give me a ring on 01274 61233      
Jeff Thelwell 

THACKLEY TRUMPIT JULY 2014 IDLE AND THACKLEY THEATRE GROUP

Idle & Thackley Theatre Group

Our production of Blackadder Goes Forth is being received with great  acclaim by all who have seen it. It is just a pity that the local community do not support their local theatre, many people not knowing that there is such a thing. Is it because we are an amateur group, people think that we are third rate? This is not the case,  our actors and actress are all professional in their approach to any role they take on, many of them attended stage school, or studied drama and music, achieving high grades, at school and college, our sets are worthy of any theatre, and costumes are hired from professional costumiers. For instance, all the uniforms for Blackadder are authentic first world ones and all the props are of the period.
Anyway to the future our junior section the ITKids who are our future are taking to the stage in August on the 1st 2nd and 3rd to display their talents in a show called Around the World in 80 Minutes a journey in song and dance.
The ITKids are a group of about 30 children aged from 5 – 16 who attend classes in our theatre twice a week, once again a very talented group. Why not come and see for yourself. If you are interested, you can visit our web site www.ittg.org.uk and have a look at us. 

THACKLEY TRUMPIT JULY 2014 HARRISON'S TT WINS

The Harrison’s Take the Isle of Man TT by STORM

It’s been a fantastic Isle of Man TT for Idle road racing family The Harrison’s. Father Conrad competing in the sidecar event and sons Dean and Adrian on solo machines.
After Conrad’s fantastic maiden victory in sidecar 1 the stage was set for an epic week on the island. In the previous race to sidecar 1, Dean competing on his RC Express racing by MSS Performance Kawasaki  finished 8th in the Superbike race completing the mountain course in 01:47:39.797 at an average speed of 126.160mph
Monday saw the Harrison brothers out in the Monster Supersport TT for the 600cc machines. Dean riding the Mar-Train Yamaha R6 gave an impressive performance against strong opposition by keeping fourth place throughout the race completing the course in 01:13:24.646 at an average speed of 123.350mph to finish only thirty seconds behind winner Gary Johnson on the Smiths Triumph. Adrian competing in his second TT on his Printing Roller Services (PRS) Honda brought the bike home in 51st position completing the course in 01:20:11.441 at an average speed of 112.921mph .
Tuesday was the RL360 Superstock race. This is for bikes that can be bought by you and me from a dealer and with a few limited modifications you can go racing. These machines are so good that they almost match the performance of the dedicated Superbike around the Island course.  An absolutely stunning performance on his RC Express racing by MSS Performance Kawasaki, Dean quickly powered the bike into second place on the first lap which he held to the finish. This was Dean’s first podium of the week completing the course in 01:11:30.882 at an average speed of 126.620mph. Twenty seconds behind winner Michael Dunlop on the BMW.
Wednesday was the second Monster Supersport race. Again Dean on his Mar-Train Yamaha R6 got off to a flying start to hold fourth place completing the course in 01:13:03.459 at an average speed of 123.946mph    finishing 40 seconds behind winner Michael Dunlop on the Honda. Adrian made a significant improvement on his first race finishing 45th completing the course in 01:19:15.639 at an average speed of 114.246mph over a minute quicker than his previous race.
Thursday was the Sure Sidecar TT 2 race Conrad and Mike Aylott on their PRS Shelbourne Honda were hoping to make it a double win. Early leaders John Holden and Andy Winkle suffered engine problems which allowed victory to Dave Molyneux and Patrick Farrance with Conrad and Mike cruising to second place and overall victory in the Sure Sidecar TT.
Friday the final day of this year’s TT with two races The Bikenation Lightweight TT for twin cylinder 650cc machines and The PokerStars Senior TT which is an open class up to 1000cc.
In the first race Dean blasted off down the Glencrutchery Road to Bray Hill on his RC Express racing by MSS Performance Kawasaki while his main rival Ivan Lintin retired on the approach to Union Mills. By the time he reached Ballacraine he was in the lead which he held to the finish. Securing Dean his maiden TT win in a time of 57:49.129 minutes at an average speed of 117.460mph, 13 seconds clear of his nearest rival James Hillier also on a Kawasaki. Adrian, on his PRS Kawasaki finished a very impressive 15th completing the course in 01:01:14.732 at an average speed of 110.888mph to earn a Bronze Replica Trophy.
The final race of the week was the PokerStars Senior TT. This was the only race in which a Harrison did not finish. Dean on his RC Express racing by MSS Performance Kawasaki was holding a strong 5th place until the third lap when machine problems forced him to retire at Sulby a disappointing end to a record breaking week at the Isle of Man TT as Conrad and Dean are the only father and son to win separate events in a single year.
I was listening to the Lightweight race at home on Manx radio. My heart was racing willing Dean on to the win.
Sitting contemplating a fantastic victory, I started thinking about Sam Harrison and how she got through this week, both sons and a husband competing, she must have nerves of steel.

THACKLEY TRUMPIT JULY 2014 JOE KING

Laugh

 I nearly passed me sweets round !

by Joe King

My First drink with my son.

I was reading an article last night about fathers and sons and memories came flooding back of the time I took my son out for his first pint. 
Off we went to our local which is only two blocks from the house.
I got him a Fosters He didn't like it – so I had it.
Then I got him a Carling Black Label, he didn't like it, so I had it.
It was the same with the 1664 Lager and Premium Dry Cider.
By the time we got down to the whisky I could hardly push the bloody pram back home.

BREAKING NEWS!

The Pound/Euro
The British Penny  -  European Union Directive No. 456179
 In order to bring about further integration with the single European currency, the Euro, all citizens of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland must be made aware that the phrase “Spending a Penny” is not to be used after 31 December 2014.
From this date onwards, the correct term will be:
“Euronating".
It is hoped that this will be a great relief to everyone.

Hello -- I have questions!

Why isn’t the number 11 pronounced  onety-one?
If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhoea...does that mean that one out of five enjoys  it?
Why do croutons come in airtight packages?
Aren't they just stale bread to begin with?
If people from Poland are called Poles, then why aren't people from Holland called Holes?
If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a race car is not called a racist?
If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?
If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, then doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?
Do Lipton Tea employees take 'coffee breaks?'
What hair colour do they putt on the driver's licenses of bald men?
I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks, so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use, Toothpicks?
Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do, write to them?  Why don't they just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen can look for them while they deliver the mail?

Shorties

A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their tournament  victories. After an hour, the manager came out and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked. "Because," he said, "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."

I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow. I rang her up and said: "Did you get my drift?"

Slept like a log last night. Woke up in the fireplace.

I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up for a date but she'd popped her clogs.

I rang up BT. I said: "I want to report a nuisance caller." He said: "Not you again."

"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We'll see about that."

When Susan's boyfriend proposed, she said: "I love the simple things in life but I don't want one of them for my husband."

THACKLEY TRUMPIT JULY 2014 FORMERLY OF THIS PARISH

Formerly of this Parish

John Wood, laments on the good, the bad & the ugly

It’s so sad. The sound of bacon and eggs cooking, the marvellous smell wafting through the kitchen have all been banished for ever in a fight against the dreaded acid stomach. Its been a battle slowly unfurling, from the day they whipped out the faithful gallbladder the system has been groaning under the weight of in-balance. Too much of this too little of that and the mixture fails to rise, in my case, it rises too much. Slowly the type of food that is deemed good diminishes to rabbit food whilst the good old stalwarts like bacon and egg are verboten.
What this does for ones own mental well being need investigation. Is the remedy worth the pain and the emotional mis-location as one pads around the kitchen in search of a healthy breakfast.
The foods one can eat are un-appetising, lacking taste and have no smell. The extravaganza of a fry-up with fried bread is a memory, clouded with the discomfort of dyspepsia, its a no go but the alternatives are so bland as to make one forget to eat !!   

Pennina Dale - Toronto

GODERICH...You remember, don't you?  Of course you do!  Well, I was there again a couple of weeks ago. Just a quick two-day visit. Lovely! especially now summer's here and the residents are now well and truly over the after-effects of the tornado of 2011. New trees in fresh green glory all around the court house again; many old favourite stores reopened and refurbished, and some that didn't make it replaced by new and very welcome   others. I was lucky enough to be on the harbour pier - on a glorious sunny morning - when a massive ocean-going ship from way up in Algoma (Northern Ontario) was coming in to load up with the precious salt which is mined from deep in the harbour waters. This giant was being nudged in by Goderich's three tiny tug-boats, all saying "me too, me too, me too!" They do so put me in mind of little puppy-dogs - never fails!  Another boat in from Hong Kong, too. The one full day I had was spent being driven around (for a change!) to a host of local towns (Southampton was one), and other interesting places. The day was rounded off very nicely (in Kincardine) for a superb fish-and-chips supper, followed by the sun setting over Lake Huron. Next morning a quick trot along the boardwalk, stopping to pick up a few new pebbles and stones to add to my garden collection, a yummy doughnut and coffee from Culbert's Bakery, and then it was (rather reluctantly) back on the trail to Toronto. I'm already eagerly anticipating my next trip to "Ontario's West Coast"!

THACKLEY TRUMPIT JULY 2014 BRIDLEWAYS

Bridleways

By Christine Hardaker

The longest day has passed and my pony still hasn’t lost all his winter coat yet, that’s usually a sign of Cushing’s disease - but then it’s possibly just old age. But with current research finding that a very high percentage of equines over the age of fifteen have got Cushing’s, probably the old saying that elderly horses hold onto their winter coats would mean that those that did stay hairy   probably had undiagnosed Cushing’s.
On the other hand my retired gelding, who is twenty seven this year, has lost all his winter coat and I think he started to moult earlier this year. That got me wondering if, after his body has settled down now having stopped the medication for his Cushing’s, perhaps he’s getting back to a more normal hormonal routine. Cushing’s is a disease which upsets the hormonal balance. So in a normal horse the coat would   begin to change as the days lengthen or shorten. The change in light received by the brain sends a signal to the pituitary gland, which then triggers the release of a hormone which controls the growth of the next coat change.
My retired gelding is still looking good for his age. I attribute that partly to the new diet I started him on over two years ago now. That was also when I noticed he was doing much better than in previous years and made me decide to try reduce his pergolide dose. I still had him blood tested at regular intervals to make sure the hormone that they measure as a diagnosis hadn’t risen back to dangerous levels. Each result has been normal, apart from one which was taken last October. This is the month when normal horses’ ACTH would rise but in a horse with Cushing’s, it rises dramatically. That’s what it did, it had spiked to higher than it had ever been. I made a calculated decision not to put him back on medication because his condition had remained exactly the same so I watched him like a hawk for the next few weeks, and he never changed.  So I had him tested again in March this year, and the levels had dropped back to normal. That was very puzzling because usually, once a diagnosis is made, it is a condition you have to manage for the rest of the horse’s life, and the vets are amazed too.
I’ve had some worrying reports of horses being spooked by cyclists using an outdoor track in Esholt woods. It was first brought up by Pam who founded WHOA. She had walked her dogs in that area and had become very worried, not only for horse riders but also for the destruction to the forest floor by the cyclists digging ramps and banks on corners. Worst fear though was that the track had appeared to have been extended across the bridleway to the other side. The potential for accidents involving a bike and a horse just doesn’t bear thinking about but I bet many horse riders reading this will envisage their horses not getting anywhere near the cyclists if, as two riders recently found out, they are travelling a breakneck speed towards you!  Two cyclists came hurtling towards them as they were on the bridleway and both horses spooked, both riders luckily just managed to stay in the saddle.
I’m appealing for anyone else who has had a fright passing in this area to call me or e-mail me please, we need to gather evidence that this track being so close to the bridleway is a hazard and it needs to be diverted away from it before there is a nasty accident.  I’m sure no horse rider would begrudge cyclists pursuing their hobby but given that they tend to like to travel at such high speeds, and in general, horses would spook at them moving at such speed, there clearly needs to be some distance made between the cycle track and the bridleway.  It is somewhat annoying that if horse riders had done this sort of excavation anywhere other than on their own farm, there would be an outcry and barriers would have been erected to shut us out.  In fact I do seem to remember quite some years ago there were complaints about kids jumping their ponies over logs in Buck Woods, and recent enquiries about reopening the barrier on Ainsbury Avenue has been met with the usual stumbling block of needing funding to erect fencing to keep us out of the main woods!  It’s the same story on the canal towpaths……I better stop now I could go on all day! I have e-mailed Bradford Council Countryside and Rights of Way manager, manager of Woodlands of Bradford and a councillor for that ward to organise an urgent site meeting with them next week.  I’ll report back with news next month but in the meantime, if you’re riding to Esholt woods, please take great care but try not to be put off, we need to keep every bridleway open.
There was another WHOA meeting on 25th June where Pam updated us with all the work she had been busy with since the last one two months ago. Unfortunately her pc died the day before the meeting so she couldn’t print out the list for me but she certainly had been very busy doing her best to research old and new bridleways. One of the subjects was a new Greenway which is being proposed to run from Menston to Otley via Burley in Wharfedale using mainly the old railway line. There was a touring public consultation which I managed to get to at Menston. We had made an extra effort to attend this one because there was no mention of horse riders being included in the plans. Other Greenways in the region have been constructed to accommodate horse riders so we needed to attend to make sure we were included before the plans got too far ahead. We were relieved to discover when we got there that due to the width of the proposed track, it is going to be suitable for equestrians as well as cyclists and pedestrians. The lady we spoke to at the church hall display was from  SUSTRANs and she explained that these off road routes were called “greenways” so they are not “owned” by any particular user and are to be used by all for leisure or commuting to work, rail stations or schools at a slow pace and to link villages avoiding roads and traffic. So in effect horses are not specifically excluded from this project but even so, we will keep an eye on this project, and make sure horses are not forgotten.
If you have any info about the Esholt Bridleway and encounters with cyclists or any other horsy information / questions, contact me on:
christinehardaker@supanet.com
or call me on 07739708727

THACKLEY TRUMPIT JULY 2014 GONE FISHIN with Idle and Thackley Angling Association

Gone Fishin...

with Idle and Thackley Angling Association

Beginners Tips

If you are thinking of taking up angling or are new to the sport here are some useful tips. Licenses-all freshwater anglers must be in possession of a current Environment Agency Rod License which are available from Post Offices. You should also join a club or pay for a day ticket to fish most venues. Day tickets on our length of the canal for example at Dobson locks Apperley Bridge can be obtained on the bank for only £3 adults or £1.50 for juniors and are available from Eccleshill Angling Supplies.
Many beginners have a tendency to make the mistake of buying short rods of only 6ft or so which can make casting much more difficult. If you are buying a rod buy the longest you can cope with and afford. Reel spools should always be filled with line to within a few mm of the lip of the spool. This makes the line come off the spool much smoother and helps casting. If necessary build up the level of the spool with some old line or fine string first before putting on the new line. Line breaking strain should be just heavy enough for the fish you   intend to catch and for the venue. Use 4 to 6lb line for river fishing for larger fish such as chub and barbel but fish much finer 2lb or less on canals and rivers for smaller fish such as roach and perch. Always fish with a slightly weaker short hook length of about a foot so that if you get fast on anything it will break there and you will not loose a lot of line or tackle.
Hook size should be varied depending on the baits being used. For heavily fished waters small hooks such as size 20 or even 22 are needed for small baits such as maggot. Use 16 or 14 hooks for medium sized baits such as worm, bread and sweetcorn. Larger hooks 12 to size 6 should be used for large baits such as luncheon meat and bread. Always weight your float correctly so that only a small part of the tip is showing. For lakes canals and ponds you should bunch most of the non-toxic weights at the bottom of the float with just a few very small ones down the line. This makes casting much easier with fewer tangles and also makes the bait fall slowly through the water leading to many more bites. For river fishing a more even string of weights between float and hook or bunched weights lower down the line may be more effective.
Look after the environment and don’t leave any discarded line, non toxic weights, litter or empty tins anywhere. Take them home and put them in the dustbin.

Swainby R Swale Open Match Result 22.6.14

The River was just above normal summer level for the first match of the season. Matty Prudhoe won the match with   2 chub and a few dace weighing 8lb 1oz on stick float and maggot from peg 40.  Second was George Huscroft 2lb 12 oz from peg 72 and third was Mark Allison 1lb 6oz from peg 47.
Future Swainby Matches- July 6th, July 20th,  Aug 3rd, Aug 24th, Sept 7th, Sept 21st, Oct 5th, Oct 19th, Nov 9th, Nov 23rd, Dec 14th and Dec 28th. For Bookings ring  Charlie Hardaker 01274 615016.
Contacts- If want any further information or have any  reasonably sensible suggestions contact.
Phone 01274 615016.
Web Site - idleandthackaa.supanet.com.
Email idleandthackaa@supanet.com

THACKLEY TRUMPIT JULY 2014 VIEW FROM MUPPET HILL By Waldorf

VIEW FROM MUPPET HILL   By Waldorf 

THACKLEY AFC

It is often said that the older one gets, the faster the passage of time, and once again a new season dawns for the Dennyboys. It seems only a couple of weeks ago that we were travelling down to Rotherham to play Parkgate in the final match of last season, in fact it was the last weekend in April. The scoreline, a two all draw, just about summed up the whole of our last campaign, finishing in a rather disappointing thirteenth position in the league. Although Thackley did manage to win something last season, the April Fair Play award for the Premier Division. 
A new season brings hope for something better, as always, the   ultimate aim is to win promotion to the next level of the pyramid, in Thackley's case the Evo-Stik League. There are also a number of trophies to play for, the most prestigious of which is the FA Cup, the best that club's at our level can hope for is a reasonable run in the competition and picking up a few quid on the way. However, the FA Vase is a different story, and Thackley have a reasonable chance of progressing to the latter stages and the possibility of, albeit somewhat optimistic, playing on the hallowed turf of Wembley. Again prize money is on offer for each victory, a successful run can make a big difference to a club's financial well being. The West Riding County Cup and the League Cup are other competitions that  Thackley are involved in, but these, although well worth winning, carry nothing in the way of financial reward.
New Manager, Andy Patterson, starts his first full season at the helm, having been appointed after taking charge of the final six games of the last campaign. Three defeats, two draws and a win was not the best start to his managerial career but the committee wanted continuity and Andy, being an ex player and still involved with the club, gave them that. I am sure after this rather faltering start, he will turn things around and will begin the season with a bang, only time will tell. He will be assisted by Mick Watson and Greg Beswick. Mick has been around Thackley for some time now, involved at both senior and junior level. Greg hails from York and was previously involved with the York Academy side. Pre-season training started during the final week of June, it is hoped that the majority of last season's players will be returning, and I am sure that the management team will be adding a few more names to the list. It would be nice to start the current campaign in similar fashion to last year, when Thackley won their opening seven league matches.  
There have been the inevitable changes to the constitution of the Premier Division, which last season consisted of twenty three teams. Five teams have left the league, (Brighouse Town promoted, Lincoln Moorlands and Winterton Rangers relegated, Basford United and Long Eaton United have moved to the new Midland Football League). Four teams have joined the league, (Worksop Town and Wakefield have dropped from the Evo-Stik, Shaw Lane Aquaforce and Cleethorpes Town have been promoted from the First Division), reducing the number of teams competing this season to twenty two. Worksop Town were not relegated, in fact they finished in fourth  position in the Evo-Stik Premier Division last season. However, financial difficulties, their owner and sole backer left the club and so they resigned from their league and were re located in the Northern Counties East Premier   Division. It is reported that their wage bill last year was well over £100,000, little wonder then that they are struggling now. I believe that their future is still rather uncertain, as they play their matches at Worksop Parramore's ground and there is some problems regarding their tenancy next season. At the time of writing, it is rumoured that Wakefield will not be around to start next season, it is reported that they are to be 'wound up'. Wakefield started out as the original Emley team, founded in 1903, after nearly 100 years playing at the ground in the village, they left in pursuit of promotion to a higher level, to play their football at Wakefield Trinity Wildcat's Ground, Belle Vue, in 2000. Although they did win promotion, they always struggled to get much support and after a rather nomadic few years, decided this season to return to play their games at the ground they had left fourteen years previously, sharing the facilities with AFC Emley, a new club formed in 2005 and currently in the NCEL First Division. So, some doubt at this moment in time of the exact number of teams that remain in the Premier Division, but all should be sorted out  before the season starts on Saturday 9th August. 
Thackley have rationalised the number of teams that they will be running at senior level next    season. They have dropped their Under 19 and Under 17 sides, these will be replaced with an Under 18 side playing in the Huddersfield League on Sunday afternoons at Apperley Bridge. They will, of course, be maintaining the First Team and the Reserves (Lancashire League), playing their matches at Dennyfield.
The League fixtures for next season are not yet available, but a number of pre-season friendlies have been arranged. They begin with an away trip to Durham City of the Northern League on Saturday 12th July. This is followed by three home fixtures, Colne (North West Counties League) on Tuesday 15th July; Kendal Town (Evo-Stik) on Saturday 19th July and Knaresborough Town (Northern Counties) on Tuesday 22nd July. A visit to North West Counties side Barnoldswick Town has been arranged for Monday 28th July. I believe there may be another couple of fixtures to fit in, thus ensuring that the players are fit and raring to go before the season starts for real in August.
The club's AGM is to be held on Monday 14th July in the clubhouse starting at 7.30pm.
Thackley's pre-season fixtures :-
Sat. 12th July Durham City away KO 3.00pm; Tue.15th July Colne home KO 7.45pm;
Sat. 19th July Kendal Town home KO 3.00pm; Tue. 22nd July Knaresborough Town home        KO 7.45pm;
Mon. 28th July Barnoldswick Town away
KO 7.45pm.